I’m sure like In The Middle, and Push The Button, the new song will soon thread its way into everybody’s pop brain and we’ll all be utterly hooked. Get Sexy even contains a stolen one half of the Tainted Love ‘boop boop’ tubular noise, and what’s more - one line of the song shamelessly copies, or mirrors even, The Ting Ting’s tune Shut Up And Let Me Go. ..
Hey! Sugababes have always pinched pop morsels and added them to their own stuff, but there’s a bigger problem… the girls have stopped singing. Literally. Keisha talks her way through Get Sexy like she may as well be dishing out guidance from a Virgin broadband call centre desk.
It all makes sense though when we accept the sorry truth… Sugababes are trying to break America. All fans of the babes have been aware for sometime now of Keisha’s growing desire to be Rihanna. It started with the hairstyle plagiarism on the cover of Changes. Well now Keisha’s launched a linguistic leg of her 'Project Make Me American', and started using words like dime and phrases like ‘Where I are’.
The greatest tragedy of the song has to be Heidi’s absence though. No high scouse harmonies, no slow bit two-thirds of the way through where Heidi laments wistfully, no nothing. On most Sugababes tracks you can practically hear Heidi grinning. But Keisha’s clearly behind the driving wheel now, even more than ever, and she’s plunging the babes into dark and stark Flo Rida depths.
Keisha needs to realise that Flo Rida's biggest hit was ripped off a Pete Burns poptastic classic, and that Sugababes are better off radiating UK pop rays, instead of trying to emulate America's quite franly dire and stank pop music scene. Like, Heidi fucking Montag is a popstar over there!
I’m biting my nails with anticipation. Is the death of Sugababes round round the corner, or will they storm the US? Let’s hope they know the train’s destination.. Because their fans no longer do. If they do break America, and decided to tour... well that will be it, they'll be 50 by the time they're back.
Which reminds me, the girls are still in their twenties, they've had a greatest hits album, and two good albums since Overloaded, so they can afford to take a risk. Still, Get Sexy is definitely one to dance patiently to in a club, and not one to give iTunes 79p for.
On an irrelevant side note, I’d like to share with you that I’m using my Grandmother’s computer to write this article, and her dictionary thinks that ‘Sugababes’ should be ‘Seabees’ or ‘squabbles’. What larks.